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Do you know how i know youre gay

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To be honest I just felt bad for her, we all just felt bad for her.

  • Andy Stitzer: Yeah.
  • Cal: I kinda felt bad for the horse!
  • Andy Stitzer: Wow, that's something.
  • Cal: So what about you? just...
  • David: [shouting] Andy for the last time, I don't want your giant box of pornography!
  • Andy Stitzer: No no no, just- Come on man!

    And you know what? a bag of sand.

  • David: What?
    • David: Hey, Paula.
    • Paula: Yeah?
    • David: I gotta tell you something. And we thought it would be fun, you know, to go to a show. Good afternoon! You just told me you're not sleeping with women any more.
    • David: You know how I know you're gay?
    • Cal: How?

      'Cause you're gay? Cool cool.

    • Cal: [Andy turns away and Cal mimics blowing his own brains out with a finger pistol]
    • David: You know how I know you're gay?

      do you know how i know youre gay

      You may notice yourself getting butterflies or longing for closeness.

      3. I've never even met you. You don’t have to “come out.”

      You just have to come home to yourself.

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    • David: No, I'm not gay.

      I'm... He's a little slow, but he got it. That’s all the more reason to meet yourself with kindness.

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    • Paula: You're such a smartass.

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    • David: You know how I know that you're gay?
    • Cal: How?
    • David: You like the movie "Maid in Manhattan".
    • Cal: You know how I know you're gay?
    • David: How?
    • Cal: I saw you make a spinach dip in a loaf of sourdough bread once.
    • David: You know how I know that you're gay?
    • Cal: How?
    • David: You have a rainbow bumpersticker on your car that says, "I love it when balls are in my face".
    • Cal: That's gay?
    • David: [loses his second "Mortal Kombat" match] Goddamn it!
    • Cal: I'm ripping your head off right now.

      Your mind says “just friends,” while your body and emotions quietly say something more.

      7. I ain't nobody's nigga.

    • Smart Tech Customer: Well, you somebody's nigga, wearin this nigga tie.
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    • Cal: I think...

      It's kinda gross.

    • Andy Stitzer: Yeah.
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      Worrying that you’re faking your feelings or pretending to be attracted to someone is a common experience when you’re questioning your identity.

      You’re not faking anything.

      I respect women! "Spoon", nigga.