How to be a gay top

The prostate is a gland that’s located at the front of the rectum between the bladder and the penis. They do this by numbing the area. But you can also use lube applicators to put lube inside you and save time later. But queer sex and sexual identity can be so much more than these two.

If you or your partner(s) are using fingers, gently applying outward pressure can help get things ready – think of it like lightly stretching open a rubber band.

Going straight to penetration without any foreplay can be painful! Be Kind

 

We’ve said it before, but we’ll say it again – communicate with your bottom! Always.

That being said, we don’t live in a perfect world, and we’re not perfect people. Sometimes bottoms are the assertive ones in a sexual relationship while tops can take a submissive role.

And you don’t have to be exclusively top or bottom.

It just means you went too quickly and need more lube and/or foreplay. The elements you choose will come down to your diet, anatomy and personal preference.

‍

Shower

‍

At minimum, go to the bathroom and get everything “out”. Tops don’t even actually have to be on top. Use them every time. If you try Popstar or Future Method as part of your prep work, make sure to write a review to let us know how it went.

It’s a signal from your body to slow down, use more lube or stop altogether. It can take some getting used to.

One way to help your anal muscles relax during sex is to gently "push" out as if you're, you know, pooping. People with HIV who achieve and maintain an undetectable viral load by taking antiretroviral therapy daily as prescribed cannot sexually transmit the virus to others.

Are You Ready?

We think you are.

For some, that might be all you need.

‍

Douching

‍

Some people use douching to prepare for bottoming. But if it makes you feel more comfortable, then spray away! Water-based lube also works with condoms and all toys but it can dry out, which means you need to re-apply more often. But to really take your topping to the next level, we like to recommend our Popstar supplement.

When it comes right down to it, one of the best ways to learn how to top is to be a bottom. This is because the rectum doesn’t self-lubricate, so you’ll need some extra help. You can try everything, but anatomy – either yours or your partner’s – can make it impossible. But for many others, things are more fluid.

Maybe you’re a top who bottoms once a year, maybe you’re vers and split it 50/50 (or 70/30, or 60/40), or maybe you don’t care about labels.